This morning I woke up to go work out and found that the alarm on our stove was going off…yet again. Our stove is fairly old and does this from time to time. So, I wiggled the alarm as usual and got it to turn off. I went to work out, and came back home about an hour later to the alarm going off again. At this point, I’m about to lose it.
I wiggled the thing again, and got it to go off for a few seconds. Thirty minutes later, I’m still wrestling with the thing as it laughs its little mechanical buzzer laugh. So, being the complete non-mechanic that I am, I pulled the stove out, saw the offending buzzer, and mangled the heck out of it with my pliers. Problem solved. Take that non-functioning annoying buzzer!
By the way, we’re starting a new parsonage project in the next few weeks. I am pretty sure this stove will not make the trip once the new parsonage is completed.
mattjudkins.com 
We had a problem like that. I also attacked the offending buzzer, but somehow also managed to mess up an important component in the stove so it didn’t heat anymore. We ended up getting a new stove.
Many years ago when I was on internship, we were housed in a dilapidated old hotel that had been converted to an apartment. We wanted to install a new toilet seat, but the bolts on the old one were so rusty I couldn’t remove them. The senior pastor loaned me a chisel to work on this. Chisels and porcelain don’t work well together. We got a whole new toilet out of the deal.
hmmmmmm…… let’s see…. failure to properly care for church property, failure to notify the Parsonage Committee so that they could set up a time to look into the matter of the stove timer that has somehow become responsive to neutrinos causing it to buzz for what may appear to be no reason at all, which leads to the Board of Trustees not being able to exercise stewardship over this scientifically-invaluable device that was formerly the parsonage stove-oven. My, my, my, Matthew….
I have a neutrino detector in my parsonage kitchen right now, too; it began life as an ordinary microwave oven. However, my neutrino detector is not working as well as yours and just sits there silently, mocking me from its built-in home above the built-in wall oven.
Now that you’ve disabled the world’s only functional neutrino detector that is located less than 6,000 feet below the surface of the earth, we will both face the Silence of the Lambs in the parsonage kitchen. And we won’t know of the billions of neutrinos whizzing by us, either.